


Cauldron of Memories

by Haanbeii



Series: Gatekeeper's World [3]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Angst, Dr. Earle is a creepy old man and he's the worst character and is probably the story-verse villian., Gen, Hurt No Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Is this me self projected? I'm not even sure anymore, i'm very tired
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-04
Updated: 2020-01-04
Packaged: 2021-02-19 11:36:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,096
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22110274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Haanbeii/pseuds/Haanbeii
Summary: Ikuma thinks about a lot of things while he takes a hot bath.
Series: Gatekeeper's World [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1584118





	Cauldron of Memories

Nightoath had always been a pretty city to him, but it was really the only place he had known for a long time. He'd been to Lightray on occasion, but never for long. The only considerable time he spent there was when he received his Key. Rose lived in Nightoath, too, despite the Keyforge being in Lightray, so he always played in the city.

But now, here he was. Desperately wishing that he could feel like things were going to be okay, as he looked out the window of his childhood home. He wanted to come see it ebfore he was forced to start school.

Except, instead of being a second year in Yumenosaki Private Academy's idol course, he was a first year. Because his mother just LOVED to baby him.

Maybe it was because he had been home schooled. Maybe it was because he'd never had a high school education, because most people his age had jobs. Maybe she wanted to torment him, not long after she had apologized. Was everything just a joke to her?

Was he anything but a joke to everyone?

He sighed and closed the curtains, and headed into the bathroom. Maybe a nice hot bath would help.

He ran the water and put the plug in when it was hot enough. He waited for it to fill before turning off the tap and removing his clothes, and settling himself in the bath.

A lot had happened in the three years since his mother told him that he would be held back on his thirteenth birthday. He'd been waiting ever since Rose's for his own, and he'd always say how he'd be the greatest Keeper there ever was. His mom would smile and remind him that it wasn't long until his birthday.

And then she did that.

Was it because she considered him too childish? Was it because he was her youngest child and, unless the encounters she had with the people in the worlds she visited ever amounted to something else, she would likely not have another. He'd asked for an explanation, even after she apologize. She would just smile and say, "I don't know." And goddammit, did that sting.

Mei La and Ayaki were normal, and they were happy. Ikuma was not. 

He looked at his arms and scowled at faded scars that had healed physically, but not emotionally. Everything had just been a whirlwind of emotions right now, and he desperately wanted it all to come crashing down.

He couldn't reach out to anyone, only a few phrases were spoken between them, and then they'd disappear, leaving him alone.

Alone.

Yes, alone. Like he was on Christmas. Like he was on New Year's. Like he was for so long.

Without someone to spill all of his emotions onto, he would just kept bottling it up, and it would keep building and building up, until the point where it became too much for him to handle, and then at that point, what would he do? Would he unload it onto some unsuspecting person? Would he learn to deal with it? Would it kill him?

Before he knew it, he was crying.

Ayaki was preparing for his wedding, and Mei La was out inviting her friends. And his mother, she had left, promising she'd be back in time for the wedding.

Ayaki said to bring whoever he wanted, but Homare was already coming since she was Mei La's friend, and Ikuma didn't want to get Aira involved with this world-travelling bullshit.

Mei La had a date. Ayaki was getting married. His mother probably would bring some man back for a date. Homare had Hana, and her friends. Rose had Candy.

And Ikuma was alone.

Mark might offer since he'd be going regardless, but Ikuma now saw Rose as a sister and all feelings of romantic love had been replaced with platonic love. Mark was her brother, so it felt awkward to be with him, even though he was only one year younger.

There was no point in wiping the tears as they rushed from his eyes, hot and fast. It felt like the bathwater was full of every single tear that he cried as he sobbed. 

Nobody was coming home, and if they did, they wouldn't care to step into the bathroom and comfort him.

He thought back to the memories of his childhood. Not all were pleasant, though. He remember his first meeting with that man.

Doctor Robert Earle, a genius doctor and scientist, who had studied DNA and body modification for so long. He'd always wanted Ikuma to be his apprentice, but he always set off red flags in Ikuma's head, so he always avoided the man. For all he knew, he'd be forced to partake in a body modification experiment and become some sort of human-fox hybrid who somehow had a womb.

He would not be surprised if that was an actual plan that Dr. Earle had. His DNA studies and body modifications mixed with magic were blessings to same-sex couples or those who couldn't conceive, and his methods were now used all over, but even Kazmir had his suspicions about this man, though with no evidence they couldn't really do much else other pray that he kicked the bucket soon since he was getting old.

He'd even thought about that being why he was held back, but his Mom had paused for a moment and said ,'Oh, yeah! That's why!"

Ikuma could tell she was lying.

His eyelids were getting heavy, and if he were to stay in the bath much longer, he'd fall asleep. He pulled out the drain and sighed as he stepped out of the tub and dried himself off, before putting on his favorite green pajamas. He was going to stay here tonight. He didn't want to be reminded of his impending doom. He'd open the door to the first year classroom, and look at a bunch of people a year younger than him. And they'd judge him. He hoped that it was worth it, and he ended up wanting to do music in the future anyways.

He snuggled into his bed and sighed. Home was a strange word. This had been home, and now his apartment in the Ensemble Stars world was home, but now they felt.... dull... lifeless. Maybe it was him and how he was feeling.

But was 'home' really a place, or was it a feeling, mixed with the people and places you love and cherish? Ikuma did not know, and he doubted he'd be able to understand.

**Author's Note:**

> I've been in an iffy mood, and I suppose that has started to affect Ikuma. Maybe I need to sleep more. Maybe I need to exercise. Maybe I need eat less, and eat more healthy stuff. Old habits are hard to break though.  
> Note to self: If you don't write another chapter of This World is What You Make It before school starts up again, you will be forced to uh.... listen to circus music on repeat. Stop writing Ikuma, and start writing your other projects.  
> I only used cauldron because I thought bathtub of memories sounded stupid.  
> Also fun fact! Dr. Earle's name was generated, and I asked for an evil name because... idk I wanted a creepy doctor dude as a villain. Both of his names come from those marked as serial killers. Wow.  
> As per usual, the Gatekeeper's World links and stuff.  
> here's the twitter for ikuma: https://ikuma-mochizuki.carrd.co/  
> here's the lore page: https://gatekeepers-world.carrd.co/  
> here's the character profiles page: https://keeper-of-characters.carrd.co/  
> ikuma is special, so you get sent to this site if you click on him: https://ikuma-mochizuki.carrd.co/  
> and homare's twitter (she's very ooc)  
> https://twitter.com/HomareEtoile (very creative, ik)


End file.
